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What I learned in Week 3 of the NFL season

In Week 3 of the NFL season, I learned that...

- ...'Hot Tub Time Machine' was a documentary, for there's no other way Case Keenum and Andy Dalton could have played on Sunday, unless it was 2011.

- ...the only thing uglier than a nor'easter is watching Cam Ward and Jameis Winston try to throw footballs in a nor'easter.

- ...Jim Harbaugh, even with the most klepto of sign-stealers, couldn't win with this bunch.

- ..., it's late September, and there's already been a Santa-sighting. His name is Drake Maye, and he's handing out presents like it's late December. 

- ...the officials from the Rams/Broncos game should start wearing brand names on their uniforms. DraftKings will likely be front and center.

- ..., after being traded from the Minnesota Vikings to the New York Giants, JJ McCarthy will likely be placed on IR, due to jet lag.

- ..., if his team doesn't improve, the Green Bay Packers head coach may wind up in a "Dodgeball" sequel (Matt Lafleur starring as Peter La Fleur).

- ..., in every horror film from this day forward, Baker Mayfield's scream will undoubtedly be featured.

- ..., in just one week, New Orleans went from Saint Kardiac Kids to Saint Cardiac Arrest.

- ...Jalen Hurts likes Andy Dalton about as much as the Lifetime Achievement Awards like Rob Schneider.
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