The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

For as long as I can remember, the Republican Party has branded itself as “the party of personal responsibility.” I will say, if there’s one area where the Republican Party has dominated the Democratic Party over the years, it’s with just that - branding and sloganeering. The only exception to this was Barack Obama’s “Yes We Can!” As has become quite clear in the decade following his presidency, he was an aberration, not the start of a trend. Here’s how the parties’ branding and sloganeering have played out through the years. GOP: “We are the party of family values!” Democrats: “Let’s look at these studies about maternity-leave…” GOP: “Democrats are tax-and-spend liberals!” Democrats: “Let’s look at the facts. Where did I put my calculator? Honey, have you seen my calculator? Anyway, vote for me.” GOP: “We are hard-working, God-fearing Christians!” Democrats: “Hey, if you want to worship a Flying Spaghetti Monster you call Lord Linguini, go right ahead! We’re not going to stop you!” Of...

The dictionary 'irregardless': "regardless" Also the dictionary 'ir-': "not; the opposite of" 'regardless': "despite everything" Me: You claim 'irregardless' is a word. What does it mean? Merriam-Webster (MW): "'Regardless'" Me: ...and what does 'regardless' mean? MW: "'Despite everything'" Me: Okay, so both 'regardless' and 'irregardless' mean "despite everything;" is that correct? MW: "Yes, that's correct." Me: What about the prefix 'ir-'? MW: "What about it?" Me: What does it mean? MW: "'Not; the opposite of'" Me: So, let me get this straight; 'irregardless,' according to you, literally means "not regardless; the opposite of regardless"? MW: "Yes" Me: Yet it also means "regardless"? MW: "That's correct." Me: 'Irregardless' means the same and opp...

With each passing day, it becomes increasingly clear voters don't approve of Donald Trump's war with Iran; voters don't approve of the financial repercussions which have resulted from it; and to put it bluntly, voters simply don't approve of Donald Trump as president.  Historically, presidents have been offered a honeymoon after starting a war overseas. It wasn't until months, even years after the initial strike when voters began to sour on things. Just ask Vietnam. Oh, and Afghanistan. Did I mention Iraq? No such grace-period was provided for Trump and his war with Iran, however. There wasn't a 9/11-style attack on American soil to trigger a bloodthirsty, united front at home. During his campaign, Trump even called himself the anti-war president, promising there would be no new wars, adding that prices were going to come waaaaaay down. So, what did he decide to do? Start a new war, which caused prices to go waaaaaay up. While it's true, 9 times out of 10, p...

In recent years, there's been a growing number of people claiming the two major parties in the United States are one and the same. While I have long asserted the issues I have with a two-party system, I'm not going to beat around the bush; the Democratic and Republican Parties are about as identical as Danny DeVito and Arnold Schwarzenegger. The biggest difference between the two parties is mindset. Democrats need consistent proof to persuade them on an issue, whereas Republicans need a sliver of evidence to prove or disprove a point. There are exceptions, of course, which often poses a paradox for the Republican Party - as they don't believe there are exceptions to every rule; they believe exceptions are the rule.  Just recently, New Jersey Governor Mikie Sherrill announced, since 2023, 400 Garden-State noncitizens have voted in elections. This has set off a firestorm amongst Republicans, as they've long-claimed rampant election fraud; that the 2020 presidential electi...

The Top Ten Changes to Palm Beach International Airport Once It's Renamed Donald J. Trump International Airport 10. Flying experience won't be required for pilots. So long as Trump once saw them play 'Galaga' at a bowling alley arcade, they'll be deemed "qualified." 9. The waiting line will be sorted by way of hotness ("10s are always first"). 8. The only exit row will be located in the cargo hold. 7. Conveyor belt-speed will increase from 0.5 m/s to 500 million m/s. 6. Near misses will be termed 'holes-in-one.' 5. Flights will only be permitted to areas which have a +0% net-approval rating of Trump, so: Wyoming, West Virginia, Russia, Idaho, and The Rocks-for-Brains Kid Rock Fan Club. 4. The noses of airplanes will be redesigned to resemble mini-mushrooms. 3. When experiencing severe turbulence, all passengers must stand and sing the national anthem.  2. Air Traffic Control will be orchestrated via Sharpie. 1. (drumroll) Next to the oxyg...

The Top Ten Expected Findings in The Donald J. Trump Presidential Library 10. "MLGA" merchandise, which stands for, "Make Libaries Great Again" 9. Trump's autobiography, "Fifty Shades of Cray" 8. Teen Beauty Pageant contestants in the True Crime section 7. Posters spread all about the facility, with the message, "I know words. I have the best words. Covfefe." 6. To gain membership, one will be required to accurately recite, "Person, woman, man, camera, TV." 5. Weekly book-burnings 4. A donation jar to the Trump "charity," "I Read Good, Bigly." 3. A summer children's program called, "Fun With Felons." 2. Anything but books 1. (drumroll) Trump's mugshot in front of the urinal, featuring the word, "BOOKed"