The Top Ten Expected Findings in The Donald J. Trump Presidential Library
10. "MLGA" merchandise, which stands for, "Make Libaries Great Again"
9. Trump's autobiography, "Fifty Shades of Cray"
8. Teen Beauty Pageant contestants in the True Crime section
7. Posters spread all about the facility, with the message, "I know words. I have the best words. Covfefe."
6. To gain membership, one will be required to accurately recite, "Person, woman, man, camera, TV."
5. Weekly book-burnings
4. A donation jar to the Trump "charity," "I Read Good, Bigly."
3. A summer children's program called, "Fun With Felons."
2. Anything but books
1. (drumroll) Trump's mugshot in front of the urinal, featuring the word, "BOOKed"
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