The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

What do you get when a white police officer kills an unarmed black man via a chokehold? Five years in prison. Oh, check that, unemployment five years later. In this episode, I talk about the recent news involving former Officer Daniel Pantaleo getting fired five years after choking and killing Eric Garner and how the seeming law enforcement-vs.-Black Lives Matter debate isn't as black and white as many suggest. In addition to this, I try to explain to my fellow whites what it actually means when someone says "Black Lives Matter!" No, as Inigo Montoya said in the classic film, The Princess Bride, "I do not think it means what you think it means." You can listen to the episode in its entirety here: https://ifeelsnitty.podbean.com/e/blue-crimes-matter/ You can check out all of my other podcasts at this link: https://ifeelsnitty.podbean.com/

So, I had a run-in with law enforcement yesterday. My lease on my old car ran out in March of this year, when I put a lease on a new vehicle. Little did I realize the stickers on my plates expired in June. Stopped at a light, I witnessed a cop's flashing lights behind me not long after we got going again. I wasn't speeding or driving erratically in any sense, so I was quite puzzled, even thinking he was going to pull over someone in front of me. After checking my insurance and license (clean record), he kindly let me off with a warning and provided me with information on where to go outside of the BMV, as it's rather notorious for long lines/waits. The discussion was short-lived. The officer was helpful and understanding. As I was on my way to meet my parents for lunch, the situation could have been a lot worse. I actually wondered to myself, "Would this have gone any differently had I been black or Hispanic?" I honestly have no idea, but I couldn't help but...

Is it just me or does it seem as though, for whatever reason, we often times hold comedians to a higher standard than authority figures? When Late Show host Stephen Colbert referred to Vladimir Putin as Donald Trump's "c*ck holster," many were calling for his removal. Even more recently, Kathy Griffin partook in a photo shoot which included a picture of her holding what appeared to be a bloodied doll head which resembled President Trump. She's received a great deal of blowback since the release of that photo, including CNN telling her she wasn't going to be a part of their New Year's Eve show. So where do we draw the line between appropriate and inappropriate, is that even possible considering its subjective nature, and why don't we hold people in power to such high standards? Whenever a joke becomes a story of controversy, I first ask the question, "What was the intent?" Some claimed Colbert's "c*ck-holster" joke was homophobic. ...

I'm getting a little tired of the us-vs.-them rhetoric we hear so often nowadays, especially with regard to law enforcement and the Black Lives Matter movement. The two aren't mutually exclusive. It's perfectly rational to be both pro-cop and pro-Black Lives Matter.  First off, no matter who we want to pin the blame on, I think many have misunderstood the intent of Black Lives Matter (BLM). BLM activists aren't saying only black lives matter; they're simply saying black lives matter too. Many black-Americans feel like their voices have been ignored and like their lives mean less than those in other demographics (perhaps 3/5 of a person), to the point where they've decided to stand up and say, "Hey, our lives matter too!" So for those who like to counter chants of "Black Lives Matter!" with "All Lives Matter!" while that's technically true, it illustrates your lack of understanding for the BLM movement. Allow me to provide an ...

Yes, the title of this blog is probably facepalm-worthy to most, but I simply couldn't resist. Pulp Fiction  and the upcoming The Hateful Eight  director, Quentin Tarantino, has come under fire recently for a comment he made at an anti-police brutality rally in Manhattan, where he said, "I'm a human being with a conscience. And if you believe there's murder going on then you need to rise up and stand up against it. I'm here to say I'm on the side of the murdered." In response, many police unions called for a boycott to all of Tarantino's films. John McNesby, president of the Philadelphia union, said this in a statement: "Mr. Tarantino has made a good living through his films, projecting into society a large violence and respect for criminals; he it turns out also hates cops." Then just yesterday, Tarantino was interviewed by the Los Angeles Times  and responded to the boycott threats with this: "I'm not being intimidated. Fra...

Unless one has been in a coma while living under a rock the past few days, there's roughly a 99.9% chance he or she has heard about the protests and rioting in Baltimore, Maryland. Freddie Gray, an African-American male, died in prison a week after he was arrested of a non-violent crime, as approximately 80% of his spine had been severed. Speculation about his death coming at the hands of the area's police force, in conjunction with the seemingly countless other such cases across the country over the past several months, sparked a number of African-Americans to protest the matter. Unfortunately, while a majority of these protesters went about their business in a peaceful manner, some decided violence and property damage was the better option. Like with the protests in Ferguson, Missouri a few months ago, this situation has brought attention to the issues of police brutality, prejudice, poverty, and (in)equality, and has prompted a vast array of opinions along the way. While I...

Former Chicago Bears head coach, current ESPN NFL analyst, and favorite to be the lead actor in the film Grumpiest Old Men - Mike Ditka - decided to take his grumpiness to the Chicago Sun Times , where he wrote a bit concerning the St. Louis Rams players' pre-game protest this past Sunday. His piece went as follows: "It's a shame this thing has come to this. The shame of it is, I'm not sure they care about Michael Brown or anything else. This was a reason to protest and to go out and loot. Is this the way to celebrate the memory of Michael Brown? Is this an excuse to be lawless? Somebody has to tell me that. I don't understand it. I understand what the Rams' take on this was. I'm embarrassed for the players more than anything. They want to take a political stand on this? Well, there are a lot of other things that have happened in our society that people have not stood up and disagreed about. I wasn't in Ferguson. I don't know exactly what happen...

I'm frankly getting fed up with hearing about all of these stories concerning white cops killing unarmed black men, and then hearing people's defense of the cops (including the cops themselves), as they resort to stereotypes, fallacies, and dehumanization as a means for excuse. So, in response to this, and in conjunction with a building rage inside of myself, I've decided to resort to writing a poem regarding matters. Black Lives Matter Don't wear a hoodie, Even if it's raining, Always bring an umbrella, Even though no one else does, Don't wear baggy pants, Where guns can be lodged, Even though that's a myth, So says Snopes.com, Don't put your hands in your pockets, Even when it's cold and snowing, Don't wear a coat either, That might worry people too, Don't wear anything nice, That may make people wonder, "Did he rob a store?" "Is that what he did with welfare?" Don't drive a nice car, As that...

Over the past 20-30 years, it's become increasingly clear where the two political parties stand on the issue of authority. While Democrats have tended to say things such as, "Government can help. We can do some good. We can make a positive difference in people's lives," Republicans have tended to say, "Government is evil! Don't trust anyone! Everyone is out to get you! We're now living in a police state!" Yes, I may have slightly exaggerated there, but you get the point. This is why I've been so befuddled by many conservatives' responses to the non-indictments of police officers Darren Wilson and Daniel Pantaleo, in the killings of Michael Brown and Eric Garner. Such individuals have defended the police of their actions by saying things such as: - "They were just doing their jobs." - "What else were they supposed to do?" - "You shouldn't say anything to the police. Everyone knows that." - "Ga...

In yet another case of victim-blaming, an Oklahoma Highway Patrol officer and an Oklahoma City Police officer have been accused of repeatedly raping women in recent months. Just last week, a Tulsa County sheriff's deputy was arrested for sexually assaulting a woman after responding to a 911 call. So, what did Captain George Brown have to say about all of this? What were his words of wisdom to women? He lent KJRH (and women everywhere) this piece of advice: "He [the captain] says the best tip that he can give is to follow the law in the first place so you don't get pulled over." There we have it. If a woman gets raped by a cop, it's really her own fault for getting pulled over in the first place. What Captain Brown is essentially saying is this: "Girls, ladies, the women, or whatever you call yourselves anymore, look - as officers of the law, while it's our job to protect the people from law-breakers and arrest those that break the law, we aren't...

Once upon a time, a South Carolina mother called the Sheriff's Office because she discovered her 15-year-old son had been watching porn. The craziest thing about this is it's not some made-up story. It actually happened. This past Tuesday, Spartanburg County sheriff's deputies were dispatched to a residence following the before-mentioned mother calling 911. As it read in the police report, "She stated that when she entered the residence, her 15-year-old son was in his bedroom. [Her] daughter turned on the TV and porn was on." The 40-year-old mother then turned off the TV, took her 2-year-old daughter out of the room, and proceeded to call 911. When Lieutenant Kevin Bobo showed up at the mother's home, he didn't make an arrest or issue a citation. Afterward, he said, "I don't know of any South Carolina law that was broken." Lieutenant Bobo also said that his department had never received such a call before, elaborating, "Is it...

In light of the shooting at the Navy Yard this past week, NRA Vice President Wayne LaPierre joined host David Gregory on Meet the Press yesterday, where the two engaged in the following back-and-forth: Gregory: "This is similar. After Newtown, you were outspoken in saying more security was the answer ... This was the Navy Yard. There were armed guards there, Mr. LaPierre. Does that not undermine your argument?" LaPierre: "No, the whole country knows the problem is there weren't enough good guys with guns! When the good guys with guns got there, it stopped..." Gregory: "Can it be the sliding scale where, you do have armed guards there, but now there's not enough armed guards? And when it comes to schools, if only we had an armed guard, and then if we had teachers with weapons, then we could stop it. I mean, where does it stop?" "Good guys" with guns? What, like the stories I've recently read of police officers shooting and kill...

What's the deal recently with Florida cops or wannabe cops shooting unarmed black people? First, George Zimmerman was found not guilty of second-degree murder in the shooting and killing of unarmed Trayvon Martin, because, well, it's purely self-defense to follow someone you find suspicious after being told not to do so by actual cops and then when the person being stalked feels threatened and defends himself, to shoot and kill him. That's self-defense 101 right there. More recently, Florida police officers fired 15 shots at unarmed 60-year old Roy Middleton in the driveway of his and his mother's home. There was a 911 call that evening for a car theft. Once the cops arrived at the scene and Middleton turned around, thinking the whole thing was a practical joke played by a neighbor, the cops opened fire on him and wound up shooting him in the leg, while also striking his mother's car and the side of the house. What did Florida Scambia County Sheriff David Morgan...

News recently broke about a woman in Maryland who was ticketed for going 63 mph in a 65 along Interstate 95 while in the left-lane. The cop who issued the ticket said she was ticketed more due to her being in the left-lane, which is reserved for speedier commuters, than for going 2 mph under the speed limit. The driver has never been ticketed before and said the area was experiencing very heavy winds, which is why she was going a bit slower than usual. She said, "Sometimes when it's dangerous, you have to do what you can to stay safe." John Townsend of AAA Mid-Atlantic appears to be backing the driver in this case, as he said the following: "The reason [the ticket] is silly because it's sending the wrong message. And that is, 'We will tolerate you driving at more than the speed limit, but if you drive below the speed limit, then you're penalized for that.'" I can see both sides' arguments here. On the one side, even if there were ...

This past Tuesday, marijuana use became legal for recreational purposes in the two states of Colorado and Washington. While I personally agree that government-regulated and taxed marijuana should be legal for recreational use, that's not the main reason why I'm so happy of these results from last Tuesday's election. I've always wanted to see signs on the road which say, "Don't Toke and Drive" and commercials which show a bunch of people smoking doobies in a car before getting pulled over, with the narrator saying, "You toke. You drive. You lose." As the eerie music sounds during that very time, the high individuals will then be showcased laughing like they had just seen a clown streaking. I can't wait to see a new type of sobriety test for high drivers. The cop will pull the person over, have the individual sit across from them before placing a number of snacks in front of their face - Twinkies, Ho-Ho's, Doritos, etc. - and time how lon...

What is the job of cops? To protect the people, right? Or am I way off base here? That's what I've always tried associating cops with. But, as I've gotten older (an elderly 30, I know), it's becoming more and more difficult for me to fully associate them with protecting the people. My brother's car got broken into not too terribly long ago. This is nothing new where he lived. In their neighborhood, cars have been broken into several times over the course of the past several months. The cops have been called numerous times and my brother called the morning when he found out his car had been broken into. They made it sound like it was no big deal. All that was taken was the stereo system and the subwoofer. It could have been worse. It's like when my mom's purse got stolen last year. They didn't think that was a big deal either, "Oh, it's just a purse." Yet, all the time, I see cops with their radar guns, trying to catch people speeding, s...

I've heard all the stories before. A very old friend of mine was pulled over in her mom's van when she was 15. Because she was 15, she had nothing- no license or anything to show the cop. The cop let her go and just told her to head on home. A cop pulled a friend of mine over for doing 28 in a 25 and because he was concerned for our safety, as there were several of us kids in the car. A friend of mine tossed a large Wendy's cup out his window as he was driving at night and guess who it hit? A cop. So, the cop ticketed him for littering and for having bumper stickers on his back window, claiming my friend couldn't see behind him at all while driving. My bro was pulled over one time for doing 46 in a 45. I was pulled over and ticketed for doing 58 in a 55. My friend's father was pulled over for doing 56 in a 55. A friend of mine's uncle got pulled over for doing exactly the speed limit on the interstate, but he was slowing down traffic, so says the copper. I'v...