The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

I think that Meat Loaf would sound quite confused, to put it nicely, if instead of singing "...but I just won't do that," he sang what he essentially means with those before-mentioned words by singing: "I would do anything for love, Oh, I would do anything for love, I would do anything for love, But I won't do anything for love." Rumor has it that when Meat Loaf was asked if he'd take his lawfully wed ded wife, to love and to cherish, to have and to hold for as long as they both shall live, he responded with: "I do, I do, I do, But I don't."

The past couple of times I've ventured to a bar, Meat Loaf's hit song "I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)" has made its appearance known via a jukebox. From the first time I heard that song 19 years ago to this past Friday night, I laugh during the chorus. Why? Because it makes absolutely no sense. Granted, there are many songs with lyrics that don't make a whole lot of sense unless a person is high on coke, drunk on Everclear, and involved in an orgy at four in the morning following a show in New York City. However, I think why I laugh so hysterically at the before-mentioned song is the fact that it's the chorus - the portion of the song that gets repeated more than "I love Jesus" by Rick Santorum at church on Sundays - that doesn't make a bit of sense. Time and time again, Meat Loaf sings, "I would do anything for love. I would do anything for love. I would do anything for love, but I won't do that." I do...