The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

It's been 3 weeks and still doesn't seem real, even though I was there when it happened. Three weeks ago today, my father passed away. It happened so quickly, it felt like a bad dream. Unfortunately, it wasn't. I find myself wanting to text him about a: storm, joke, crazy news story, or Detroit Tigers game, only to realize there will be no response.  The truth is he had been ill for a while, yet we always tried to remain hopeful. Lung issues exacerbated to the point where his doctors recommended going through the process for a lung transplant, and what an arduous process it was - 'arduous' doesn't even do it proper justice. I keep trying to tell myself he's no longer suffering, yet it's difficult to not ask the "What if?" questions, and wonder if something could have been done to have elongated his life, or to have at least allowed him to live his final years in a healthier, happier state.  My dad and I had a rather atypical relationship, as ov...

It appears the family has decided to go with the traditional obituary for my father, who passed the evening of May 21st. I spent a lot of time working on a non-traditional obituary for him, as I wanted to share stories of the man I called dad, and more fully capture the essence of his character. It may be different. The language may be more colorful at times than is typical. But that's who he was; I loved him for it; and I know, deep down, he'd love this. RIP, dad. You'll be greatly missed.    Neal Christopher Rozniecki (or as he sometimes called himself, “Kneel”) was finally able to set his mind at ease on May 21, 2025. If you spent even just 5 seconds with Chris, you knew his mind was always in overdrive – often making unexpected detours along the way. This 73-year road trip started on March 29, 1952, in Detroit, Michigan, with his parents Joan (Jimmy) and Ed at the wheel. Chris, like his father, always excelled in math, so he naturally started his work-journey at Baskin-...

I don't often get personal on here, but feel the need to do so to start the new year. I've never really been one for New Year's resolutions. This year is different, however. Last year was a bumpy, transitional year for me. For the longest time, I was battling early- to middle-life demons, from childhood sexual abuse to epilepsy to a brain tumor and subsequent surgery and beyond. I never fully dealt with the abuse I suffered as a child, for fear my attacker would come after me. This led me to depression, isolation, anxiety, and alcohol. With the help of those closest to me, I finally began the process of placing those demons behind me last year. I still have a ways to go, however, and hope I'm able to ultimately defeat said demons this year. That's my ultimate goal. I no longer want to be in any way controlled by the demons of my past. I want to finally feel like I have some control over my life. I want to be a better man, a better father, a better boyfriend, a b...

Texas Senator and craziest person this side of anywhere - Ted Cruz - may be cuckoo for cocoa puffs for a very good reason - his father, Rafael. When talking to a group of Oklahoma gun rights advocates earlier this month, Rafael Cruz said the following: "And of course, this leads us -- when there are no moral absolutes -- leads us to sexual immorality, leads us to sexual abuse, leads us to perversion. And, of course, no hope. No hope." Ironically enough, according to USA Today , "Nearly 17,000 people have suffered sexual abuse at the hands of the clergy since 1950." Those dam* atheist clergymen! I tend to find absolutes absolutely ridiculous. "Thou shalt not kill." That sounds simple and moral enough. However, what about in times of war? Defending oneself against an intruder? If Mr. Cruz is anti-war and anti-gun, perhaps he does believe in moral absolutes after all, but I'm thinking that's highly unlikely. If Cruz does believe in war...

Two of the early favorites to represent the Republican Party in the 2016 presidential election - Chris Christie and Rand Paul - have been going going at it in recent weeks - with Christie criticizing Paul's libertarian leanings and Paul criticizing Christie for allegedly being about big government. Well, Rand needn't worry anymore, because his father and former Republican candidate in just about every presidential primary since 2000 it seems - Ron Paul - has made his voice known on the matter. Speaking with Neil Cavuto on Fox News, the elder Paul had this to say on the recent bickering between his son and Christie: "That would be safe to say (about not being a Christie fan). He's not going to have a change of heart. He's a big government person. It would be similar to the last go-around. I couldn't endorse our candidate. ... I don't like the bickering back and forth. I think it was significant debate -- one person blasting those of us who believe in lib...

It's being reported that the 53-year old former American Idol judge and current X Factor judge - Simon Cowell - has impregnated Lauren Silverman, who happens to be married to Cowell's "close" friend, Andrew Silverman. Mr. Cowell, how would you judge that bit of news? "That was terrible, I mean just awful." Rumor has it that Cowell will be teaming up with Dick Cheney when they go on a We're-The-Best-Friends-A-Person-Could-Ever-Have Tour, where they'll take turns shooting friends in the face and sleeping with their wives. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/31/simon-cowell-baby_n_3681801.html http://www.angrysimon.com/simon_quotes.html

Reverend Paul Scalia - son of Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia - appears to be just as anti-gay as his old man. In fact, he may have one-upped the man voted less likable than Oscar the Grouch, as it appears the reverend doesn't even believe that homosexuality exists. In a 2012 article he wrote for Humanism: Issues in Family, Culture & Science , Paul Scalia said the following: "In short, we should not predicate 'homosexual' of any person. That does a disservice to the dignity of the human person by collapsing personhood into sexual inclinations. Indeed, the Church is still trying to find the right vocabulary to speak about this modern phenomenon ... Either our sexuality is oriented in a certain direction (i.e. toward the one-flesh union of marriage), or it is not. We cannot speak of more than one sexual 'orientation' any more than we can think of the sun rising in more than one place (i.e. the orient)." That was a lovely comparison made by Sca...

Christopher Stanlane - a 34-year old resident of Fairmont, North Carolina - accidentally shot and killed his 10-year old son while cleaning his shotgun on Sunday afternoon. The father was said to be cleaning his shotgun while on the couch and his son was in front of him watching television when the gun went off and struck the boy in his head, which killed him instantly. With the investigation ongoing, no charges have been filed to this point. I have so many questions for the father upon reading this story. First off, why in the world would he not check to make sure his gun wasn't loaded before cleaning it? Next, why wouldn't he make sure to point the gun away from anyone, regardless of whether or not it was loaded? Lastly, why would he not go about this in a different room than where his 10-year old son resided? This guy obviously didn't have proper training and at this point in his life, was much too careless and uneducated to be owning a firearm. This is one reason wh...

It appears as if an on-and-off-again friendship of 20 years is officially over for me. Through his alcoholism, drug problems, and all the other issues he's had to deal with through the years, I was that friend who didn't leave his side. I had known him for so long and got to see a side to him that most everyone else hadn't. Through this, I saw hope, a light, a decent human being at his core. However, after some monstrous bumps in the road the past few years, with us slowly drifting apart as a result, what occurred in the past 12 hours was the final straw. The guy has always had an angry side to him, but having observed how he is around his daughter, I saw that kind, loving, nurturing side as well, and this kept that hope in me alive. That hope started subsiding four months ago when I altered my relationship status on Facebook. After he saw that my girlfriend was of a darker skin tone than either he or I, he sent me a lengthy e-mail, telling me how "disappointed"...

No, I'm not getting married, not yet anyway. I JUST read this article about the tradition of asking a woman's father for permission to marry his daughter. The gist of the article was to see if that very tradition has lost some steam through the years. Now, I admit, I'm not much of a traditionalist. I think some traditions are grand for the simple fact that they can bring families together, but at the end of the day, I think many of them are, for lack of a better word, silly. Given that, I got to thinking about the tradition of a man asking his father-in-law to be for permission to marry his daughter and yes, I'm going to say it - I think it's stupid. Mark it down. Quote me. Fathers of single daughters between the ages of 21 and 41, blacklist me. I'll give you some time. Given how old many of you are, I suppose I'll continue with this piece. The telegraphs should arrive at some point in the future. Okay, before you bash me for being disrespectful to a wom...

1) If my daughter gets sick, what will you do to ensure she has a quick recovery? A) Whatever the doctor says B) Give her a call button and tell her that she can use it at any time C) Do all the work she would have done had she been feeling well D) Hand her a trash can, recipe book, a Cosmo Magazine and $5 as you walk out the door saying, “I’ll see you in a week after I return from Vegas with my other b*tches” 2) What would you do to treat my daughter to a romantic evening? A) Dinner and a movie (chick flick) B) Make her a candlelight dinner C) Recite poems you’ve written for her by the fireplace D) Get drunk, take her to a strip club and continually point to her and shout out, “Give her a $20! She’s better than these other ones! Give her a $20 and see what she can do!” 3) What is your favorite physical feature of my daughter? A) Her smile B) Her legs C) Her hair D) Her big beautiful 34D eyes 4) Where would you take my daughter for your honeymoon? A) Hawaii B) Paris...