The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

"The Nice Guy Curse" Lacking the mystery, Lacking the adventure, Lacking the risk, Lacking the danger, No challenge is present, No project on which to work, Rarely any drama to be had, It must be too good to be true, To take care of you when sick, Bring you flowers on a rainy day, Have dinner ready by the time you get home, Write you poems to express what I want to say, To clean the house with no qualms, Run errands without mention, Make sure the toilet seat's down, Take care of the kids, pets, laundry and dishes, Open and honest, Loyal to the core, Someone to hold and comfort you, To love you ever more, But I lack the mystery, Lack the adventure, Lack the risk, Lack the danger, A best friend, A counselor, A comedian, But not a lover, Someone who makes you happy, Who makes you smile, Who makes you laugh, But not enough to be mine, I sit here and wonder, Why this never works, Why must I alter who I am? Because of the nice guy cu...

Just last week, I went to a concert at a local bar and when I went up to the dance floor and began dancing with a woman, what was the first thing she said to me? “Are you gay?” I had to scratch my head a bit, smiled and asked, “What was that?” She again asked, “Are you gay?” When I responded with a no, I honestly wonder if she believed me. This was not a rare occurrence for me. In fact, I’d say this happens 1 out of every 2 times I go out. I went to a pub a few months ago and one lady there would not leave me alone about it. She asked me, “Are you married?” I responded with a no. “Do you have a girlfriend?” No again. “Are you gay? No. She didn’t seem to buy that and carried on, “You have to be gay. You’re hot. Come on, a hot single guy your age? You have to be gay. Just come out with it. It’s okay. I’m not going to judge you. Let this be your night you come out.” This continued for several minutes before she started going around the bar and asking women, “Isn’t he ho...

I wrote a theory about this a while back in the blog entitled "Nice Guys vs. Bad Boys". I said then that it seemed to me women perhaps liked having the challenge of shaping up the bad boy and if (and when) things went wrong, she'd have the nice guy with whom to talk. This way, she gets to keep both the boyfriend and the friend. If she went about it the other way and dated the nice guy, do you really think the bad boy would play the role of nice guy and listen to her vent? Although, what would she have to vent about? Vent about not having anything to vent about? Do people really do that? I wrote that theory from careful observation, good listening and of course, first-hand experience. I bumped into another situation like this a while ago. A person I know has a history of dating guys who are jerks, to be nice (no pun intended). So, a guy whom she claimed was "very nice" and "very easy to talk to" asked if they could go out sometime and she declined and...