The Top Ten Trump Birthday Requests/Gifts
10. A lifetime supply of Whoppers
9. The audiobook for "Two Corinthians Walk Into a Bar"
8. Cheeto spray tan
7. A black belt in bunker-hiding
6. An unlimited supply of Monopoly get-out-of-jail-free cards
5. An Ivanka Trump blow-up doll
4. The Mike Huckabee-VHS-narrated documentary, "Rambo Christ"
3. A new rodent to place on his head, courtesy of RFK, Jr.
2. A crucifix featuring his name and "The Best Wood"
1. (drumroll) A coffee mug which reads, "Higher Approval Rating Then IQ"
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