Skip to main content

The Trump-Netanyahu Phone Call

It's becoming quite clear this is how the conversation went between Trump and Netanyahu 3 weeks ago.

Netanyahu: "Greetings."
Trump: "Peace be with everyone."
Netanyahu: "Speaking of which, I want you to bomb Iran."
Trump: "I'd love to, but I'm the anti-war president."
Netanyahu: "Trust me, I'll make it worth your while."
Trump: "Like, what, more golden showers in Russia?"
Netanyahu: "Ew, no."
Trump: "Hey, don't knock it unless you've sprayed it, or tried it, or something."
Netanyahu: "If you bomb Iran..."
Trump: "I'll beat loser Biden in 2020?"
Netanyahu: "No."
Trump: "Well, I'm not gonna lie, that's disappointing."
Netanyahu: "If you bomb Iran..."
Trump: "Ivanka won't be my daughter anymore, so she can be wife #4."
Netanyahu: "I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that."
Trump: "Hear what?"
Netanyahu: "Exactly. Anyway, as I was saying..."
Trump: "That I want to bang my daughter?"
Netanyahu: "Ugh! Yuck! For the last time, let me finish!"
Trump: "Are you threatening me?"
Netanyahu: "Yes, what, no, why?"
Trump: "I was just going to say, you're lucky, oh so bigly lucky, I'm the most anti-war president in the history of the United Shtathes."
Netanyahu: "If you bomb Iran, I'll nominate you for the Nobel Peace Prize."
Trump: "Done. You see, that wasn't so hard, was it? I'm the greatest deal-maker in the history of deal thingies."
Netanyahu: "Yeah, sure, I gotta go and do something, anything - wash my hair. There, that's it."
Trump: "Thank you for your attention to this matter."

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My first book review of "Penetrating the Heart of Life: Ambiguous In Thought, Ambivalent In Feeling"

Well, I received my first book review on this poetry-compilation book I completed and published late last year, but have finally gotten around to marketing now. The reviewer gave it 5 out of 5 stars and said: "I enjoyed the poetic journey the writer has taken me on. From darkest days and hopeful optimism to the conclusion of hope realized. The visual images that the poem titled "Room Temperature" elicits, made me think of the song, "Horse With No Name" sung by the band America. In a similar manner, another poem – "Deafening Sigh-lence" reminded me a great deal of Simon & Garfunkel’s song, "The Sound of Silence". There are so many poems in this book that I related to, that I felt a connection to the author and felt that we were traveling on this journey together." http://www.lulu.com/shop/craig-rozniecki/penetrating-the-heart-of-life-ambiguous-in-thought-ambivalent-in-feeling/paperback/product-18677501.html
Post a Comment
Read more

A closer look at the Scramble With Friends power-ups

I am unashamed to admit that I'm a nerd. My idea of a good time is playing a word game like Boggle or Scrabble. Thankfully, I (and many others) can play such games via Facebook and/or my (our) cell phone(s). While it seems that cheating has become more commonplace in these games (Words With Friends in particular) than San Diego has had nice weather, I've yet to give in to that craze. One element present with the game Scramble With Friends (Boggle) not present in Words With Friends (Scrabble) are legal boosts called "power-ups," which cost a number of tokens from the 15 available. I've now tried all five power-ups, including the latest one which costs money. So, in case anyone's curious about playing the game or giving these power-ups a gander, here's a rundown of them all: Freeze - I think this is probably my favorite of all the power-ups. With the freeze, time stands still for a matter of seconds, which allows you more time to find words and improve...
Post a Comment
Read more

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...
2 comments
Read more