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What I learned in Week 11 of the NFL season

In Week 11 of the NFL season, I learned that...

- ...the Jets are so bad, if the team were infected with COVID, most people would feel sorry for COVID.

- ...the Cincinnati Bengals and their offensive line should be charged with neglecting and endangering a young-adult quarterback.

- ...if Bill Belichick is doing commercials; talking about Syria at press conferences; and leading a 4-6 Patriots team, it might be 2020.

- ..., if quarters were years, Derrick Henry would be like a fine wine. ...which could fly around a room and knock out random people.

- ..., after her husband's team was shutout, Kelly (AKA Karen) Stafford will likely tweet that the 4-7 Carolina Panthers defense is a dictatorship.

- ..., if the standard for a dad-bod was Mr. Universe, D.K. Metcalf would be the king of dad-bods.

- ..., this coming Thursday, all teams not named the Philadelphia Eagles will be giving thanks for Carson Wentz.

- ...Adam Thielen's trainer/glove manufacturer is apparently Clifford Franklin (Orlando Jones' character in "The Replacements").

- ...Cleveland Browns' opponents will inevitably start filing lawsuits against the team for Nick Chubb's hurdle being a hate crime.

- ...Tom Brady will have to go get some testing done at the doctor's this week, for he's exhibiting signs of early-Football Alzheimers.

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