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About that Obama and Beyonce rumor...

I usually don't like to post about crazy rumors, but thought I could have a little fun with this one, so I thought I'd make this an exception to the rule.

Yesterday, French paparazzo Pascal Rostain claimed that the Washington Post would post a story today about President Barack Obama having an affair with pop star Beyonce. In a story published by the French newspaper Le Figaro, he said the following:

"You know, at this time, in the United States, there is something big that is happening. It'll go out tomorrow in the Washington Post - we can say that it is not the gutter press - an alleged affair between President Barack Obama and Beyonce."

Rostain then attempted to elaborate upon his belief with this:

"First, there are still or television images of the Obama couple becoming a little distant. It is legitimate to ask questions. We found the same thing, always through images, between [French President] Hollande and [his partner Valerie Trierweiler]. Afterwards, there was the rumor. Same for Obama and Beyonce, for example. Just because it's a rumor doesn't mean that one should not go in the field to check. We should not forget Marilyn [Monroe] or Monica Lewinsky."

A spokesperson for the Washington Post has since sent an email to Poynter.com, saying, "It's definitely not true."

Even if the rumor is false, as the Washington Post alleges, let's pretend for a moment that it's true. I have to imagine the thought processes of the three presidents Mr. Rostain mentioned would go a little something like this (while adding a make-believe affair for George W. Bush as well):

President John F. Kennedy: ::on the phone with an adviser:: "Okay, I want you to find me someone who epitomizes the word sexy and bring her to me. I want to do the deed with her if she'll let me. Who am I kidding? Of course she will. I'm J F - frickin' K!"


President Barack Obama: ::on the phone with an adviser:: "Alright. What I'm about to ask you isn't anything I'm proud of, but I'm frustrated with Congress right now and want you to find me the most beautiful woman in the world and bring her to me so I can release some of that frustration doggystyle, or any other style she prefers. Thank you."


President Bill Clinton: ::on the phone with an adviser:: "Do you see a woman? No? Where the hell are you? The first woman you spot, bring her to me. See one now? She's not my type? They're all my type right now! Little Billy is lonely and needs some company!"


President George W. Bush: ::on the phone with an adviser:: "Uh, I'm with someone right now and she's not my wife. What do I do? Yeah, our clothes are off. I've got some weird rubbery thing in my other hand right now which I'm thinking about making into a balloon animal. I shouldn't do that? Crap! So now what? I put what in where? Are you sure? Alright, if you say so. Before you go, could you bring me any of that Viva Las Vegas stuff? Oh, Viagra? Yeah, that. Cinnamon says I could probably use some. Thanks."

http://entertainment.time.com/2014/02/10/obama-beyonce-affair-rumor/

http://hollywoodlife.com/2014/02/10/beyonce-president-obama-affair-cheating-rumors-washington-post/

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