In a recent ad, former Arkansas Governor and five-time winner of a Dunkin' Donut eating contest - Mike Huckabee - had this to say regarding what's at stake in this year's presidential election:
"Many issues are at stake, but some issues are not negotiable: The right to life from conception to natural death. Marriage should be reinforced, not redefined. It is an egregious violation of our cherished principle of religious liberty for the government to force the Church to buy the kind of insurance that leads to the taking of innocent human life.
Your vote will affect the future and be recorded in eternity. Will you vote the values that will stand the test of fire? This is Mike Huckabee asking you to join me November 6th and vote based on values that will stand the test of fire."
That's right, ladies and gentleman - if you vote for Obama, you're likely going to hell!
Yes, according to Mr. Mike Pillsbury Doughboy Huckabee, for one to enter the gates of heaven, he or she must be more in line with Republican nominee Mitt Romney's values. What are these values? Let me share them with you courtesy of a Jeff-Foxworthy-type bit. This will be called, "You might go to heaven if..." While I'm not recommending you develop schizophrenia, I do suggest you hear Foxworthy's voice while reading these statements.
- "You might go to heaven if you take a trip with your family and put your dog on the hood of your car to enjoy nature at its finest - meaning, when nature calls, he pisses and shi*s on that nice car roof!"
- "You might go to heaven if you bully a gay kid at school and cut off his hair, fearful he might overtake you for best hair in the class!"
- "You might go to heaven if you care about the poor and not the wealthy - wait, reverse that - if you care about the wealthy and not the poor, you might go to heaven."
- "You might go to heaven if you tell so many lies, you can't seem to remember most of them and wind up answering questions by saying, 'I stand by what I said back then, whatever it was.'"
- "You might go to heaven if you're a Mormon, not a Christian."
http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2012/10/30/mike_huckabee_to_christians_vote_for_obama_and_face_the_fires_of_hell.html
"Many issues are at stake, but some issues are not negotiable: The right to life from conception to natural death. Marriage should be reinforced, not redefined. It is an egregious violation of our cherished principle of religious liberty for the government to force the Church to buy the kind of insurance that leads to the taking of innocent human life.
Your vote will affect the future and be recorded in eternity. Will you vote the values that will stand the test of fire? This is Mike Huckabee asking you to join me November 6th and vote based on values that will stand the test of fire."
That's right, ladies and gentleman - if you vote for Obama, you're likely going to hell!
Yes, according to Mr. Mike Pillsbury Doughboy Huckabee, for one to enter the gates of heaven, he or she must be more in line with Republican nominee Mitt Romney's values. What are these values? Let me share them with you courtesy of a Jeff-Foxworthy-type bit. This will be called, "You might go to heaven if..." While I'm not recommending you develop schizophrenia, I do suggest you hear Foxworthy's voice while reading these statements.
- "You might go to heaven if you take a trip with your family and put your dog on the hood of your car to enjoy nature at its finest - meaning, when nature calls, he pisses and shi*s on that nice car roof!"
- "You might go to heaven if you bully a gay kid at school and cut off his hair, fearful he might overtake you for best hair in the class!"
- "You might go to heaven if you care about the poor and not the wealthy - wait, reverse that - if you care about the wealthy and not the poor, you might go to heaven."
- "You might go to heaven if you tell so many lies, you can't seem to remember most of them and wind up answering questions by saying, 'I stand by what I said back then, whatever it was.'"
- "You might go to heaven if you're a Mormon, not a Christian."
http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2012/10/30/mike_huckabee_to_christians_vote_for_obama_and_face_the_fires_of_hell.html
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