In an odd move made by the Republican Party, following Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu's speech to Congress on Tuesday, House Speaker John Boehner made the following announcement:
"This speech, this day will go down in the history books, because on this day we finally discovered who our real president is, and that's my friend, Bibi Netanyahu!"
The announcement came a little over six years after President Barack Obama was sworn into the Oval Office and a little over three minutes after a Republican had last said, "We all know you're from Kenya, Obama! Show us your birth certificate again! The real one this time and not all those fake other ones!"
Nationwide, Republicans applauded the big announcement, with some of the better known ones saying this:
- "Bibi is a type of gun and I like guns, so I like Bibi Netanyahu." - musician Ted Nugent
- "I've said it before and I'll say it again, Barack Obama doesn't love America. You know who does? Benjamin Netanyahu. Bibi loves this country just about as much as I love my cousins!" - former New York City mayor Rudy Giuliani
- "Something always seemed foreign about Obama, but that's certainly not the case with the dude from Israel!" - Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson
The Republican National Committee joined the celebration, as they released this statement:
"For as much as we stand by the fact we're the party of freedom and democracy, and for as much as we believe racism is over in this country, we'd much rather have an American-looking foreigner than a foreign-looking American as president of this country - the United States of America - the greatest country in the history of the world!"
In response to all of this, President Obama said his next order of business is to convince Congress to strengthen educational standards in the subject of geography all across the country. At last check, Congressional Republicans were looking up the word "geography" in the dictionary.
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