I'll be the first to admit that I'm an over-analyzer. I earned three degrees in psychology, took elective courses in philosophy and critical thinking. My very first words as a child were, "I think therefore I am." Alright, so that last bit isn't true. I have always been a thinker, though, which is what prompts me to drink on weekends. I have to slow that mind down somehow. Why not go about it legally through the consumption of alcohol? Thanks, Jack (Daniels)! Having said all this, though, even I find the over-analyzing by art critics regarding former President George W. Bush's paintings absurd to the point of being comical.
The Bush family got hacked by someone who calls himself Gucifer, who stumbled upon Dubya's latest hobby - painting. The two paintings which seemed to most catch people's attention were of the former president, naked and cleaning himself. In one of the two paintings, Dubya was standing in a shower, in the nude (even Dubya knows not to shower fully clothed, at least he does now), with a mirror in front of him providing a reflection of his face. The second showcases the former president soaking in the tub, again fully nude (I'm surprised by this as well), with the water running and just his legs and feet showing.
With those lovely images in mind, let me provide you some perspectives from art critics.
Christopher Benfey had this to say about the shower painting:
"I see one face peering out of the mirror, but is there another head emerging between those two pigeon-toed feet? Privacy! Why can't a president get any privacy? Eyes are watching everything you do. It's like Pyscho..."
Christopher Knight of the Los Angeles Times said: "Is George W. finally coming clean? Out, damned spot! Out, I say!"
New York critic Jerry Saltz had much more to say about the paintings, as he said the following:
"These are pictures of someone dissembling without knowing it, unprotected and on display, but split between the promptings of his own inner drives and limited by his abilities. They reflect the pleasures of disinterestedness. A floater. Inert. The images of a man who saw the entire world from inside but who finds the smallest most private place in a private home to imagine his universe. Of almost nothingness. Sweet sublime oblique oblivion. The visibility of invisibleness."
Michael Schaffer of the New Republic said the following about the shower painting:
"Consider the composition. The subject of the painting is not actually under the water. Physically, he stands back, reticent, his body still dry. In the shaving mirror, he watches from above, as if surveying the scene from an aircraft, a vaguely confused look on his face"
Schaffer also commented on the bathtub painting, as he said:
"Why put up with the discomfort of lying down in a half-empty tub waiting for the water to pour down? The answer is clear - subconscious remorse about waterboarding. Consider the white item above the faucet. Perhaps it is a bunched-up curtain, or a towel hanging from a rack. But there is no window on that wall, and it is doubtful that the Bush family's bathrooms are so cramped as to require that towels be hung within the tub itself. No, that item is likely a representation of the interrogator himself, preparing to give the helpless captive a dun in the water, even as the prisoner tries to distance himself."
Do these art critics REALLY think Bush put that much thought into his paintings?
Here's a man who said the following during his presidency:
- "I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn't here."
- "I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family."
- "Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?"
- "There's an old saying in Tennessee -- I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee -- that says, fool me once, shame on -- shame on you. Fool me -- you can't get fooled again."
- "Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country."
- "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."
I'm willing to bet my left nut that Bush didn't put nearly as much thought into his paintings as these are critics contend. Here's what I think was going through the former president's mind when working on both paintings, starting with the one in the shower:
"I'm bored. After three years, those darn drunken solitaire tournaments are getting a little tiresome. Where's that picture Laura took of me in the shower while I was masturbatibulating? Ah, here it is. I think I'm going to paint that. Not on the wall this time, or Laura will get mad. Hmm... Maybe I'll ask for her to get me some paper, some paint, and those one things - bushes, bruhushes, brushes, whatever they're called. This is going to be neat. I'm going to be the next Vincent Vanguard or Leonadro DiCaprio. I think I'll call this 'A Man and His Right Hand in the Shower'."
Here's how I envision his thoughts with regard to the bathtub painting:
"This water is getting cold. The bubbles are almost all gone. This rubber ducky doesn't work anymore. What am I going to do? I don't want to get out of the tub. I've only been in here for three hours and I know if I get out before that one time, Laura will want to go shopping at Wal-Mart, and I don't want to do that again. We've already done that the past six days. Today would make that nine - nine too many, if you ask me! I know what I'm gonna do! I'm gonna drain out this cold water, fill the tub back up with hot water and do some painting! What could possibly make for a better painting than my legs and feet in a tub with water? Mona Theresa better watch out! I think I'll call this one 'My Soaking Bush'."
http://www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2013/02/08/george_w_bush_s_paintings_and_self_portrait_critics_weigh_in.html
http://politicalhumor.about.com/od/bushquotes/a/dumbbushquotes.htm
The Bush family got hacked by someone who calls himself Gucifer, who stumbled upon Dubya's latest hobby - painting. The two paintings which seemed to most catch people's attention were of the former president, naked and cleaning himself. In one of the two paintings, Dubya was standing in a shower, in the nude (even Dubya knows not to shower fully clothed, at least he does now), with a mirror in front of him providing a reflection of his face. The second showcases the former president soaking in the tub, again fully nude (I'm surprised by this as well), with the water running and just his legs and feet showing.
With those lovely images in mind, let me provide you some perspectives from art critics.
Christopher Benfey had this to say about the shower painting:
"I see one face peering out of the mirror, but is there another head emerging between those two pigeon-toed feet? Privacy! Why can't a president get any privacy? Eyes are watching everything you do. It's like Pyscho..."
Christopher Knight of the Los Angeles Times said: "Is George W. finally coming clean? Out, damned spot! Out, I say!"
New York critic Jerry Saltz had much more to say about the paintings, as he said the following:
"These are pictures of someone dissembling without knowing it, unprotected and on display, but split between the promptings of his own inner drives and limited by his abilities. They reflect the pleasures of disinterestedness. A floater. Inert. The images of a man who saw the entire world from inside but who finds the smallest most private place in a private home to imagine his universe. Of almost nothingness. Sweet sublime oblique oblivion. The visibility of invisibleness."
Michael Schaffer of the New Republic said the following about the shower painting:
"Consider the composition. The subject of the painting is not actually under the water. Physically, he stands back, reticent, his body still dry. In the shaving mirror, he watches from above, as if surveying the scene from an aircraft, a vaguely confused look on his face"
Schaffer also commented on the bathtub painting, as he said:
"Why put up with the discomfort of lying down in a half-empty tub waiting for the water to pour down? The answer is clear - subconscious remorse about waterboarding. Consider the white item above the faucet. Perhaps it is a bunched-up curtain, or a towel hanging from a rack. But there is no window on that wall, and it is doubtful that the Bush family's bathrooms are so cramped as to require that towels be hung within the tub itself. No, that item is likely a representation of the interrogator himself, preparing to give the helpless captive a dun in the water, even as the prisoner tries to distance himself."
Do these art critics REALLY think Bush put that much thought into his paintings?
Here's a man who said the following during his presidency:
- "I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn't here."
- "I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family."
- "Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?"
- "There's an old saying in Tennessee -- I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee -- that says, fool me once, shame on -- shame on you. Fool me -- you can't get fooled again."
- "Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country."
- "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."
I'm willing to bet my left nut that Bush didn't put nearly as much thought into his paintings as these are critics contend. Here's what I think was going through the former president's mind when working on both paintings, starting with the one in the shower:
"I'm bored. After three years, those darn drunken solitaire tournaments are getting a little tiresome. Where's that picture Laura took of me in the shower while I was masturbatibulating? Ah, here it is. I think I'm going to paint that. Not on the wall this time, or Laura will get mad. Hmm... Maybe I'll ask for her to get me some paper, some paint, and those one things - bushes, bruhushes, brushes, whatever they're called. This is going to be neat. I'm going to be the next Vincent Vanguard or Leonadro DiCaprio. I think I'll call this 'A Man and His Right Hand in the Shower'."
Here's how I envision his thoughts with regard to the bathtub painting:
"This water is getting cold. The bubbles are almost all gone. This rubber ducky doesn't work anymore. What am I going to do? I don't want to get out of the tub. I've only been in here for three hours and I know if I get out before that one time, Laura will want to go shopping at Wal-Mart, and I don't want to do that again. We've already done that the past six days. Today would make that nine - nine too many, if you ask me! I know what I'm gonna do! I'm gonna drain out this cold water, fill the tub back up with hot water and do some painting! What could possibly make for a better painting than my legs and feet in a tub with water? Mona Theresa better watch out! I think I'll call this one 'My Soaking Bush'."
http://www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2013/02/08/george_w_bush_s_paintings_and_self_portrait_critics_weigh_in.html
http://politicalhumor.about.com/od/bushquotes/a/dumbbushquotes.htm
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