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Believers in the invisible, but not of the observable

It cracks me up to hear people whom are certain of God's existence claim that global warming is a hoax. The following two scenarios will better illustrate just how I see such individuals.

Experiment #1

 Scientist Mike Theory: "So, you don't believe in global warming, correct?"

Donald Dump: "Of course not! It's nothing but a hoax!"

Theory: "So why are the polar ice caps melting then?"

Dump: "It's all part of God's plan apparently."

Theory: ::takes an ice cube out of a freezer and places it on a table:: "Do you see this ice cube?"

Dump: "Yes..."

Theory: "I just took it out of the freezer. Notice how it's getting smaller?"

Dump: "Yes..."

Theory: "Why is that do you think?"

Dump: "Because it's warmer in here than in the freezer! Duh!"

Theory: "Very good. So, take that knowledge and apply it to what we talked about earlier. Why are the polar ice caps melting again? Because it's getting w...a...r..."

Dump: "It's part of God's plan."

Theory: "Ugh. I give up."


Experiment #2

 Scientist Mike Theory: "You're a big believer in God, is that correct?"

Donald Dump: "Yes, of course."

Theory: "Could you point him out to me please?"

Dump: "Oh, he's all around us."

Theory: "Okay, show me."

Dump: "You can't see him?"

Theory: "I'm asking you to point him out to me."

Dump: "Just look around you. He's everywhere."

Theory: "I see a table, a couple of chairs, some pencils, books, and a few other things. What does God look like, so I know how to spot him?"

Dump: "I don't know. I think he's white and has a beard."

Theory: "You don't know? I thought you said you could see him and he was all around us. If that's true, then how can you not know what he looks like?"

Dump: "I said he's white with a beard!

Theory: "So, he looks kind of like Santa Claus?"

Dump: "No, God's beard never goes white!"

Theory: "So, perhaps more like Zach Galifianakis then?"

Dump: "Who?"

Theory: "Nevermind. Well, I hate to tell you this, but I don't see a white man with a beard in here, do you?"

Dump: "That's because you're not looking!"

Theory: "We're the only two people in here..."

Dump: "...and God..."

Theory: "Jesus..."

Dump: "He's here too."

Theory: "Where?"

Dump: "Everywhere"

Theory: ::sighs:: "I'm afraid we'll have to end this experiment now, so I can go out and have myself a drink. Have a nice life..."

Dump: "And after-life!"

Theory: "Sure..."
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