Tired of having to abbreviate fifteen consecutive words to a friend through a text message? Tired of contemplating the possibility of typing up to 140 characters on a single tweet in your Twitter account? Contemplate no more! Introducing Twexter - The device that puts both Twitter and texting to shame with how quick and easy it is to use! It's so quick and easy, it has been mistaken for Jason Biggs' character in "American Pie"! Either on your cell phone or computer, simply go to Twexter.com, set up a free account and be on your way to something special! Twexter only accepts abbreviations and affords a member a maximum of six characters per twext. It's time to stop expressing those genuine thoughts and feelings through a long series of abbreviations and grammatically-incorrect sentences so condensed, cavemen refer to them as "Gump Haikus"! Why go through all of that effort? Why spend one minute on a message to a loved one when you can spend a mere 3 seconds on one? It's not rocket science. Twexter will save you time, which will save you money. It will save you from exerting too much energy in communicating to another which will save you from headaches and naptime. Twexter can save you from having any thoughts, feelings or life! If you want to contemplate no more and we sincerely mean that, call us now at 1-800-DUMBA*S and we'll set you up with this new wave of communication and include a free new cell phone device, called The Grunt! That's 1-800-DUMBA*S! Call now!
I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun
Comments
Post a Comment