Over the past week, I've had fun with the following Twitter trending hashtags: #VeryStableGenius, #ReligiousFreedomDay, #Nielsen, #26K, #FakeNewsAwards, #ChangeAWordRuinABook, #MarchforLife, #CaptionAnyTrumpPic, #TrumpShutdown, #ReleaseTheMemo, and #WomensMarch2018. I didn't get too crazy with any of them individually, but combined, it was a new level of craziness for yours truly. Here are my posts, ordered from the post popular to the least popular (all my posts can be seen here - https://twitter.com/CraigRozniecki):
1) If the GOP were a football team:
"Look, our offense didn't do its job. Our defense didn't do their job. Not even the special teams unit did their job. So why did we lose? The other team."
#TrumpShutdown
539 Likes, 292 Retweets
2) It's humorous GOPers blame Democrats for the government shutdown when they elected a president whose brain shut down many moons ago.
#TrumpShutdown
609 Likes, 203 Retweets
3) Fifty Shades of Cray
#ChangeAWordRuinABook
577 Likes, 143 Retweets
4) Original quote: "With great power comes great responsibility."
GOP's revised version: "With great power comes great reason to blame the minority."
#TrumpShutdown
386 Likes, 178 Retweets
5) It's official; on the 1-year anniversary of Trump's inauguration, we have a government shutdown. I guess it's fitting since Trump's basically shut down the government since inauguration day.
#TrumpShutdown
182 Likes, 81 Retweets
6) 2012
GOP: "We built that!"
2018
GOP: "Build what? Naw, that wasn't us. It was, look over there!"
#TrumpShutdown
171 Likes, 65 Retweets
7) What Trump should have said on 1/20/17 - inauguration day:
"One year from today, we're going to have the bigliest, best shutdown ever! Just tremendous, fantastic, covfefe! It's going to be so unbelievable, you're not going to believe it, believe me!"
#TrumpShutdown
138 Likes, 64 Retweets
8) "For the all-too-coveted Fake News Story of the Year Award, it appears we have a tie between the following: Donald Trump's inauguration crowd was the largest in history; Trump's approval rating is equal to Obama's; and Trump won the popular vote."
#FakeNewsAwards
143 Likes, 58 Retweets
9) Dow Jones
At the recession's peak: 6,594.44
When Obama left office: 19,732.40
Change: +199.2%
Today: 25,931.79
Change: +31.4%
The number Trump would need to equal Obama: 39,306.94
#26k
118 Likes, 77 Retweets
10) A summation of the week:
A porn star spanked Trump with his own face; he may be getting spanked by a woman whose name rhymes with Nope Dicks; he went back on a deal & shut the gov't down; & as a fake president does, dished out Fake News awards. Oh, & Sh*tholegate.
#TrumpShutdown
119 Likes, 58 Retweets
11) GOP: "Let's bomb the sh*t out of countries; fight to take away people's healthcare; battle against progressions in the scientific/medical communities; make abortions more prevalent with our policies; worship the death penalty, but also march for life."
#MarchforLife
#Snark
110 Likes, 60 Retweets
12) "The nominees for Best Word are: Nambia, covfefe, bigly, and United Shtates."
#FakeNewsAwards
105 Likes, 30 Retweets
13) In honor of Trump's 1-year anniversary as president, allow me to share a list of all his accomplishments:
#TrumpShutdown
94 Likes, 40 Retweets
14) A father/son talk
GOP: "Son, one day, I'm going to hand this company over to you. You'll be in charge of it. It's going to fully be your responsibility. So if it fails, that falls on...someone else's shoulders, bigly."
#TrumpShutdown
88 Likes, 45 Retweets
15) Trump: "Russians decided our election; the government is shut down; I'm having an affair with someone in the White House; called colored nations sh*tholes; did a porn star named Stormy; am seen as a joke around the world. MAGA!"
#TrumpShutdown #Snark
84 Likes, 44 Retweets
16) "...and the winner for Sh*thole of the Year is Donald Trump's mouth! Congratulations!"
#FakeNewsAwards
91 Likes, 21 Retweets
17) Headline: "Donald Trump speaks at a fourth-grade level, the lowest of last 15 U.S. presidents, according to analysis"
Trump: "Two words: I'm a very stable genius."
#VeryStableGenius #Snark
60 Likes, 29 Retweets
17) The GOPers' #MarchForLife event should really be called #MarchForLifeUntilBirth.
64 Likes, 25 Retweets
19) The GOP's shift
2013 shutdown
Huelskamp: "Most Americans realize the gov't shutdown has no impact on their daily life. They got their mail today; they're going to get their Social Security check."
Massie: "It's just not that big of a deal."
2018 shutdown
"We're all gonna die!"
#TrumpShutdown #Snark
61 Likes, 23 Retweets
19) If Trump were Santa Claus:
"Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, and Vixen, take me east! Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen, take me west! Rudolph, take me both east and west! Hey, why aren't we going anywhere? Why are we stuck? It's all Rudolph's fault!"
#TrumpShutdown
65 Likes, 19 Retweets
21) #WomensMarch2018
Trump: "Hey, they should be out there celebrating the economy!"
Psst, they were marching at this time last year too. Given Drumpf's logic, they must have been celebrating 2016's economy, before The Donald became president...
48 Likes, 14 Retweets
22) Trump: "Let us now honor a real news story and look back at the fine reporting on the Bowling Green massacre..."
#FakeNewsAwards #Snark
48 Likes, 13 Retweets
23) #Nielsen: "The president used strong language. The language was so strong, in fact, I can't remember the exact words he used."
#Snark
40 Likes, 17 Retweets
24) What Donald Trump seems to fail to realize is that while the stories he presented in his #FakeNewsAwards may have been inaccurate to some extent, these errors were later corrected, unlike the 2,000+ lies he's told in his first year in office.
37 Likes, 18 Retweets
25) Nielsen origin: Nordic
Norway demographics: 98.0% white
"Aren't Norwegians mostly white?"
Kirstjen Nielsen: "Golly gee whiz, I don't know! Who on earth would know that? Gosh!"
#Nielsen #Snark
40 Likes, 13 Retweets
26) #Nielsen: "I did not hear the word sh*thole. What I did hear was the word sh*thouse. The president was merely honoring Black History Month, whenever that is, by singing The Commodores' hit song, 'She's a sh*thouse. She's mighty mighty, just lettin' it all hang out.'"
#Snark
40 Likes, 12 Retweets
27) When the shutdown ends
Trump: "I think this proves how bigly great I am as president. Without doing anything, I ended the shutdown. I'm like the Chuck Norris of presidents, people!"
#TrumpShutdown #Snark
40 Likes, 11 Retweets
28) Trump: "I'm a deal-maker. I'm a master dealer. I make the best deals, believe me. When I made a deal with Congress the other day, it was just fantastic. That's when a voice in my head named McNasty took over. The art of the deal. That's me, folks, bigly."
#TrumpShutdown #Snark
37 Likes, 9 Retweets
29) "Can I take my hand down yet? The anthem's almost over, right?"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
32 Likes, 13 Retweets
30) "Whenever a woman sees my penis, she kind of makes a face like this."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
31 Likes, 12 Retweets
31) Just imagine if the GOP had gone w/a similar talking point in the 2013 shutdown as they did w/the 2018 shutdown:
"Democrats are fighting to continue giving more people healthcare & saving lives in the process. We're taking money away from the military, so like yeah..."
#TrumpShutdown
30 Likes, 9 Retweets
32) I'm celebrating #ReligiousFreedomDay by creating a new religion, Rozism. In Rozism, we: Take a Gatorade shower to become members, consume weed and Doritos every Saturday night during service, & believe in no laws. Don't infringe on our right to live in accordance with our faith!
33 Likes, 4 Retweets
33) "I can hold my breath under water longer than anyone the world has ever seen. Here, let me show you."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
26 Likes, 10 Retweets
33) Lord of the Lies
#ChangeAWordRuinABook
30 Likes, 6 Retweets
35) "I learned one thing in school. One thing. That one thing was, uh, hmm, eh, I may have to get back to you on that. I forgot. Oops."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
25 Likes, 10 Retweets
36) "...and you do the hokey pokey and you turn yourself around. That's what it's all about. Bigly."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
24 Likes, 10 Retweets
37) "Whenever I see Vlady's butt, I do a lot of this."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
23 Likes, 8 Retweets
37) War and Pence
#ChangeAWordRuinABook
27 Likes, 4 Retweets
39) "I'm the world's best kisser, believe me. When I go up to a beautiful woman, I put my lips together like this, and do the deed. It drives them crazy, so so crazy."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
22 Likes, 8 Retweets
39) "The government shutdown's going to be this big and bigger! So yuge! So yugely fantastic, believe me!"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
24 Likes, 6 Retweets
41) Trump: "We had a shutdown before I drained the swamp. Now we're having another one. What's that mean? I drained the swamp. Logic, people."
#TrumpShutdown
20 Likes, 9 Retweets
41) "I give that porn star I banged while married to Melania two thumbs up and a sexy face. I'm irresistible, aren't I?"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
22 Likes, 7 Retweets
43) Tales of a Fourth Grade Speech
#ChangeAWordRuinABook
24 Likes, 4 Retweets
44) Remember when Republicans used troops as props during their 2013 shutdown, claiming that their party was stripping funds from our military? Me neither.
#TrumpShutdown
17 Likes, 8 Retweets
45) "So, I like went up to Heidi Klum and I told her, 'You are like so not a 10 anymore. I mean, for sure. Totally. Like, yeah.'"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
16 Likes, 7 Retweets
46) "I remember when I went to give a newborn a high-five. I'll never forget the look on her face when she saw her hands were bigger than mine. It went a little something like this."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
13 Likes, 5 Retweets
46) "Okay, I'm going to show the world that I can sign a bill. I call it Mad Libs. A preposition? What's that? Oh, I know; I'll write, 'Come to my place and I'll show you my tower.' A verb? Ugh! These are tough!"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
13 Likes, 5 Retweets
46) "I thought it was supposed to be windy today. Those stupid weather-people don't know what in the hell they're talking about!"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
15 Likes, 3 Retweets
46) "The only thing Obama did right was when he pardoned turkey Donald on Thanksgiving in his final year."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
15 Likes, 3 Retweets
50) "I used to play this game with my kids all the time. Peekaboo. You can't see me, can you?"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
10 Likes, 6 Retweets
50) "Find your happy place. Find your happy place. Ah, there it is."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
12 Likes, 4 Retweets
52) Here's the GOP-authored memo:
"- Half-white Obama was racist aginst White People
- Obama continued serve-eh-lens practices started long be4 him, so there Obummer's fault
-PBO dint resighcle a water bottle once, which is worse then Watergate"
#ReleaseTheMemo #Snark
13 Likes, 1 Retweet
Totals: 4,451 Likes, 1,733 Retweets (averages of 85.6 Likes, 33.3 Retweets)
1) If the GOP were a football team:
"Look, our offense didn't do its job. Our defense didn't do their job. Not even the special teams unit did their job. So why did we lose? The other team."
#TrumpShutdown
539 Likes, 292 Retweets
2) It's humorous GOPers blame Democrats for the government shutdown when they elected a president whose brain shut down many moons ago.
#TrumpShutdown
609 Likes, 203 Retweets
3) Fifty Shades of Cray
#ChangeAWordRuinABook
577 Likes, 143 Retweets
4) Original quote: "With great power comes great responsibility."
GOP's revised version: "With great power comes great reason to blame the minority."
#TrumpShutdown
386 Likes, 178 Retweets
5) It's official; on the 1-year anniversary of Trump's inauguration, we have a government shutdown. I guess it's fitting since Trump's basically shut down the government since inauguration day.
#TrumpShutdown
182 Likes, 81 Retweets
6) 2012
GOP: "We built that!"
2018
GOP: "Build what? Naw, that wasn't us. It was, look over there!"
#TrumpShutdown
171 Likes, 65 Retweets
7) What Trump should have said on 1/20/17 - inauguration day:
"One year from today, we're going to have the bigliest, best shutdown ever! Just tremendous, fantastic, covfefe! It's going to be so unbelievable, you're not going to believe it, believe me!"
#TrumpShutdown
138 Likes, 64 Retweets
8) "For the all-too-coveted Fake News Story of the Year Award, it appears we have a tie between the following: Donald Trump's inauguration crowd was the largest in history; Trump's approval rating is equal to Obama's; and Trump won the popular vote."
#FakeNewsAwards
143 Likes, 58 Retweets
9) Dow Jones
At the recession's peak: 6,594.44
When Obama left office: 19,732.40
Change: +199.2%
Today: 25,931.79
Change: +31.4%
The number Trump would need to equal Obama: 39,306.94
#26k
118 Likes, 77 Retweets
10) A summation of the week:
A porn star spanked Trump with his own face; he may be getting spanked by a woman whose name rhymes with Nope Dicks; he went back on a deal & shut the gov't down; & as a fake president does, dished out Fake News awards. Oh, & Sh*tholegate.
#TrumpShutdown
119 Likes, 58 Retweets
11) GOP: "Let's bomb the sh*t out of countries; fight to take away people's healthcare; battle against progressions in the scientific/medical communities; make abortions more prevalent with our policies; worship the death penalty, but also march for life."
#MarchforLife
#Snark
110 Likes, 60 Retweets
12) "The nominees for Best Word are: Nambia, covfefe, bigly, and United Shtates."
#FakeNewsAwards
105 Likes, 30 Retweets
13) In honor of Trump's 1-year anniversary as president, allow me to share a list of all his accomplishments:
#TrumpShutdown
94 Likes, 40 Retweets
14) A father/son talk
GOP: "Son, one day, I'm going to hand this company over to you. You'll be in charge of it. It's going to fully be your responsibility. So if it fails, that falls on...someone else's shoulders, bigly."
#TrumpShutdown
88 Likes, 45 Retweets
15) Trump: "Russians decided our election; the government is shut down; I'm having an affair with someone in the White House; called colored nations sh*tholes; did a porn star named Stormy; am seen as a joke around the world. MAGA!"
#TrumpShutdown #Snark
84 Likes, 44 Retweets
16) "...and the winner for Sh*thole of the Year is Donald Trump's mouth! Congratulations!"
#FakeNewsAwards
91 Likes, 21 Retweets
17) Headline: "Donald Trump speaks at a fourth-grade level, the lowest of last 15 U.S. presidents, according to analysis"
Trump: "Two words: I'm a very stable genius."
#VeryStableGenius #Snark
60 Likes, 29 Retweets
17) The GOPers' #MarchForLife event should really be called #MarchForLifeUntilBirth.
64 Likes, 25 Retweets
19) The GOP's shift
2013 shutdown
Huelskamp: "Most Americans realize the gov't shutdown has no impact on their daily life. They got their mail today; they're going to get their Social Security check."
Massie: "It's just not that big of a deal."
2018 shutdown
"We're all gonna die!"
#TrumpShutdown #Snark
61 Likes, 23 Retweets
19) If Trump were Santa Claus:
"Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, and Vixen, take me east! Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen, take me west! Rudolph, take me both east and west! Hey, why aren't we going anywhere? Why are we stuck? It's all Rudolph's fault!"
#TrumpShutdown
65 Likes, 19 Retweets
21) #WomensMarch2018
Trump: "Hey, they should be out there celebrating the economy!"
Psst, they were marching at this time last year too. Given Drumpf's logic, they must have been celebrating 2016's economy, before The Donald became president...
48 Likes, 14 Retweets
22) Trump: "Let us now honor a real news story and look back at the fine reporting on the Bowling Green massacre..."
#FakeNewsAwards #Snark
48 Likes, 13 Retweets
23) #Nielsen: "The president used strong language. The language was so strong, in fact, I can't remember the exact words he used."
#Snark
40 Likes, 17 Retweets
24) What Donald Trump seems to fail to realize is that while the stories he presented in his #FakeNewsAwards may have been inaccurate to some extent, these errors were later corrected, unlike the 2,000+ lies he's told in his first year in office.
37 Likes, 18 Retweets
25) Nielsen origin: Nordic
Norway demographics: 98.0% white
"Aren't Norwegians mostly white?"
Kirstjen Nielsen: "Golly gee whiz, I don't know! Who on earth would know that? Gosh!"
#Nielsen #Snark
40 Likes, 13 Retweets
26) #Nielsen: "I did not hear the word sh*thole. What I did hear was the word sh*thouse. The president was merely honoring Black History Month, whenever that is, by singing The Commodores' hit song, 'She's a sh*thouse. She's mighty mighty, just lettin' it all hang out.'"
#Snark
40 Likes, 12 Retweets
27) When the shutdown ends
Trump: "I think this proves how bigly great I am as president. Without doing anything, I ended the shutdown. I'm like the Chuck Norris of presidents, people!"
#TrumpShutdown #Snark
40 Likes, 11 Retweets
28) Trump: "I'm a deal-maker. I'm a master dealer. I make the best deals, believe me. When I made a deal with Congress the other day, it was just fantastic. That's when a voice in my head named McNasty took over. The art of the deal. That's me, folks, bigly."
#TrumpShutdown #Snark
37 Likes, 9 Retweets
29) "Can I take my hand down yet? The anthem's almost over, right?"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
32 Likes, 13 Retweets
30) "Whenever a woman sees my penis, she kind of makes a face like this."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
31 Likes, 12 Retweets
31) Just imagine if the GOP had gone w/a similar talking point in the 2013 shutdown as they did w/the 2018 shutdown:
"Democrats are fighting to continue giving more people healthcare & saving lives in the process. We're taking money away from the military, so like yeah..."
#TrumpShutdown
30 Likes, 9 Retweets
32) I'm celebrating #ReligiousFreedomDay by creating a new religion, Rozism. In Rozism, we: Take a Gatorade shower to become members, consume weed and Doritos every Saturday night during service, & believe in no laws. Don't infringe on our right to live in accordance with our faith!
33 Likes, 4 Retweets
33) "I can hold my breath under water longer than anyone the world has ever seen. Here, let me show you."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
26 Likes, 10 Retweets
33) Lord of the Lies
#ChangeAWordRuinABook
30 Likes, 6 Retweets
35) "I learned one thing in school. One thing. That one thing was, uh, hmm, eh, I may have to get back to you on that. I forgot. Oops."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
25 Likes, 10 Retweets
36) "...and you do the hokey pokey and you turn yourself around. That's what it's all about. Bigly."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
24 Likes, 10 Retweets
37) "Whenever I see Vlady's butt, I do a lot of this."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
23 Likes, 8 Retweets
37) War and Pence
#ChangeAWordRuinABook
27 Likes, 4 Retweets
39) "I'm the world's best kisser, believe me. When I go up to a beautiful woman, I put my lips together like this, and do the deed. It drives them crazy, so so crazy."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
22 Likes, 8 Retweets
39) "The government shutdown's going to be this big and bigger! So yuge! So yugely fantastic, believe me!"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
24 Likes, 6 Retweets
41) Trump: "We had a shutdown before I drained the swamp. Now we're having another one. What's that mean? I drained the swamp. Logic, people."
#TrumpShutdown
20 Likes, 9 Retweets
41) "I give that porn star I banged while married to Melania two thumbs up and a sexy face. I'm irresistible, aren't I?"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
22 Likes, 7 Retweets
43) Tales of a Fourth Grade Speech
#ChangeAWordRuinABook
24 Likes, 4 Retweets
44) Remember when Republicans used troops as props during their 2013 shutdown, claiming that their party was stripping funds from our military? Me neither.
#TrumpShutdown
17 Likes, 8 Retweets
45) "So, I like went up to Heidi Klum and I told her, 'You are like so not a 10 anymore. I mean, for sure. Totally. Like, yeah.'"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
16 Likes, 7 Retweets
46) "I remember when I went to give a newborn a high-five. I'll never forget the look on her face when she saw her hands were bigger than mine. It went a little something like this."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
13 Likes, 5 Retweets
46) "Okay, I'm going to show the world that I can sign a bill. I call it Mad Libs. A preposition? What's that? Oh, I know; I'll write, 'Come to my place and I'll show you my tower.' A verb? Ugh! These are tough!"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
13 Likes, 5 Retweets
46) "I thought it was supposed to be windy today. Those stupid weather-people don't know what in the hell they're talking about!"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
15 Likes, 3 Retweets
46) "The only thing Obama did right was when he pardoned turkey Donald on Thanksgiving in his final year."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
15 Likes, 3 Retweets
50) "I used to play this game with my kids all the time. Peekaboo. You can't see me, can you?"
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
10 Likes, 6 Retweets
50) "Find your happy place. Find your happy place. Ah, there it is."
#CaptionAnyTrumpPic
12 Likes, 4 Retweets
52) Here's the GOP-authored memo:
"- Half-white Obama was racist aginst White People
- Obama continued serve-eh-lens practices started long be4 him, so there Obummer's fault
-PBO dint resighcle a water bottle once, which is worse then Watergate"
#ReleaseTheMemo #Snark
13 Likes, 1 Retweet
Totals: 4,451 Likes, 1,733 Retweets (averages of 85.6 Likes, 33.3 Retweets)
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