A Phone Call Between RFK, Jr. and Donald Trump

This is how I picture a phone conversation between Donald Trump and RFK, Jr.

Trump: "Hello?"
Jr.: "Did you hear that?"
Trump: "Hear what?"
Jr.: "That voice. It was almost like it was speaking to me."
Trump: "That was me."
Jr.: "Who is this?"
Trump: "You called me."
Jr.: "What do I call you? I don't even know who you are."
Trump: "Donald Trump"
Jr.: "Oh, yeah, I've been meaning to call you."
Trump: "You just did."
Jr.: "When?"
Trump: "Just now"
Jr.: "But we've been on the phone for a couple of minutes."
Trump: "Okay, so a couple of minutes ago."
Jr.: "A couple of minutes ago what?"
Trump: "You called me."
Jr.: "Who are you again?"
Trump: "Donald Trump"
Jr.: "THE Donald Trump?"
Trump: "That's the one. I am he/him or whatever."
Jr.: "I thought you hated pronouns."
Trump: "I do."
Jr.: "Then what's with the he/him?"
Trump: "I don't know what you're talking about."
Jr.: "Anyway, I wanted to talk to you about an endorsement."
Trump: "That would be fantastic, just unbelievable."
Jr.: "First, though, I need to know a couple of things."
Trump: "Shoot"
Jr.: "What are your thoughts on vaccines?"
Trump: "Probably the biggest accomplishment of my presidency. I created them with my own bare hands to fight the Jiiina Virus. Amazing, amazing stuff."
Jr.: "Yeah, we may have a problem."
Trump: "What? What problem? I don't have any problems. Look at me. I am quite the specimen, if I do say so myself."
Jr.: "You just did."
Trump: "That's what I'm saying. So what's the problem?"
Jr.: "Vaccines are on the verge of destroying the universe."
Trump: "I find that hard to believe."
Jr.: "It's true." :: texts Trump a meme, which just says, "Vaccines destroying the universe" ::
Trump: "Wow, that's some pretty serious stuff, very serious."
Jr.: "That's what I mean. I don't think I can endorse you if you champion vaccines, whether you made them or not."
Trump: "I hate vaccines. Vaccines are stupid. You can't spell 'vaccine' without 'stupid.' That's a fact. Goggle it."
Jr.: "Thank you. I've been saying that for as long as I can remember."
Trump: "How long is that?"
Jr.: "What day is this?"
Trump: "Saturday, I think"
Jr.: "Then it was earlier today."
Trump: "You've got a good memory. I wish I could remember that well."
Jr.: "Oh, you can. Three words: Heroin."
Trump: "I'll have to look into that. Wait, does that involve needles?"
Jr.: "Yes"
Trump: "So you got the jab?"
Jr.: "You could say that."
Trump: "I just did."
Jr.: "Touche"
Trump: "Two-what? What is that, Russian?"
Jr.: "Si"
Trump: "I don't know what you're talking about right now, but I need to end this. Do I have your endorsement or not?"
Jr.: "Oui, oui"
Trump: "Whatever. I do need to go to the bathroom, though, so thanks for the reminder."
Jr.: "ou'reyay elcomeway"
Trump: "You're weird."
Jr.: "You too, my good man. It's truly an honor to endorse you."
Trump: "Finally! Was that so hard?"
Jr.: "There's that voice again. Where is it coming from?"
Trump: "I hear it too. I better go before they get any more information from us."
Jr.: "Don't talk. Don't say another word. Just hang up."
Trump: "That's good thinking."
Jr.: "But you're talking."
Trump: "So are you"
Jr.: "No, I'm not. I'm not talking. Nobody is talking."
Trump: "I'm not talking either."
Jr.: "So who is talking?"
Trump: "I don't know."
Trump/Jr.: "Ahhhhhhhhh!!!" :: they simultaneously hang up ::
#TrumpIsALaughingStock #VoteBlue

My first book review of "Penetrating the Heart of Life: Ambiguous In Thought, Ambivalent In Feeling"

Well, I received my first book review on this poetry-compilation book I completed and published late last year, but have finally gotten around to marketing now. The reviewer gave it 5 out of 5 stars and said: "I enjoyed the poetic journey the writer has taken me on. From darkest days and hopeful optimism to the conclusion of hope realized. The visual images that the poem titled "Room Temperature" elicits, made me think of the song, "Horse With No Name" sung by the band America. In a similar manner, another poem – "Deafening Sigh-lence" reminded me a great deal of Simon & Garfunkel’s song, "The Sound of Silence". There are so many poems in this book that I related to, that I felt a connection to the author and felt that we were traveling on this journey together." http://www.lulu.com/shop/craig-rozniecki/penetrating-the-heart-of-life-ambiguous-in-thought-ambivalent-in-feeling/paperback/product-18677501.html

A closer look at the Scramble With Friends power-ups

I am unashamed to admit that I'm a nerd. My idea of a good time is playing a word game like Boggle or Scrabble. Thankfully, I (and many others) can play such games via Facebook and/or my (our) cell phone(s). While it seems that cheating has become more commonplace in these games (Words With Friends in particular) than San Diego has had nice weather, I've yet to give in to that craze. One element present with the game Scramble With Friends (Boggle) not present in Words With Friends (Scrabble) are legal boosts called "power-ups," which cost a number of tokens from the 15 available. I've now tried all five power-ups, including the latest one which costs money. So, in case anyone's curious about playing the game or giving these power-ups a gander, here's a rundown of them all: Freeze - I think this is probably my favorite of all the power-ups. With the freeze, time stands still for a matter of seconds, which allows you more time to find words and improve...

Boycotting jukeboxes because of TouchTunes

I love music and enjoy hitting the bar(s) over the weekend, so naturally, when the mood strikes me, I've never been coy about playing some songs on the jukebox. This past Thursday, a friend of mine turned 50, so several friends of her's, including myself, all met up to celebrate the occasion. At around 9:30, a friend of mine and I both chipped in $5 to play some songs on the jukebox. Four hours and 231 skips later, we gave up on hearing the songs we had selected, and went home knowing we had just wasted $5. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened to me (and many others), and due to that, I'll be boycotting jukeboxes. Why? The scam known as TouchTunes. You see, here's how the plot typically breaks down. A person (or group of people) downloads the TouchTunes app on his/her phone, consumes one too many adult beverages, and due to this, has less care for spending extra money to hear the songs of their choosing right NOW. That's the thing with TouchTun...

The Kind-Hearted Smart Aleck

Search This Blog